


I used to be a star

by Rainbowfootsteps



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Space, Astronauts, Drabble, Gen, Poetic, Space Stations, Stars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-29
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-16 23:30:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5845138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbowfootsteps/pseuds/Rainbowfootsteps
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alfred knows he used to be a star. Now he gets to be amongst them once again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I used to be a star

I used to be a star.

I mean, I can’t prove it or anything. If you looked at me, you wouldn’t think so. But I’m sure of it. I’ve always been pulled towards outer space, that cold, beautiful emptiness. Every night I would look up towards the moon and wish I could reach out and touch it. When times were bad, and my father yelled and stomped, I would escape up in the stars. I would open my creaky window as far as I could and sit on the windowsill. Up there it was safe. Up there it was silent. That was where I came from. Maybe my soul was a shooting star, falling to earth and ending his journey amongst whispering pine trees. I wish I hadn’t fallen.

I’m in space. But I still can’t touch it. Ten years of study and work and I’m in space but I still can’t touch it. The walls of the spaceship are white and smooth. We’re about to dock the broken satellite. Then I’ll be able to touch the stars. 

“Ready to go?” I nod. My spacesuit is heavy and I can hear every breath, every heartbeat. The door closes and I lose sight of my companion. His hair is white like the stars. His eyes twinkle like the nebulae. I wish I was more like him. I’m a star, but I don’t look like one. My eyes don’t sparkle. My hair is sandy. But soon I’ll be able to touch the stars. 

The door slides open. I’m tethered to the spaceship by a rope. So fragile, so thin. On my back is a booster, letting me control my drift. I start to float weightlessly. Is this how it feels to be a star? The Earth is close. I can see oceans and clouds and god it’s more beautiful than I ever imagined. I look away from the earth. Stars. More than I’ve ever seen, more than I could ever count. I reach out to them. I can’t touch them. I need to start work on the satellite; otherwise my oxygen will run out. But the pull of the stars is too great. I need to be amongst them.   
“Are you alright?” His voice crackles in my helmet.  
“Yeah.” I respond. I’m not alright. My heart is pounding, my fingers trembling. I float down to the satellite. Hit its surface, bounce off slightly. I made my decision long before I got into space.   
“Ivan.” My voice is strong.  
“What?”  
“I’m going home.”  
“What are you talking about? Alfred? Is something wrong with the suit?” His voice almost makes me waver. I reach down to the buckle connecting me to the ship. I undo it.  
“Alfred, speak to me. Are you returning to the ship?”  
“No.” All that keeps me from floating to oblivion is my grip on the satellite. The solar panels shine.  
“I told you, Ivan. I’m going home.” 

I push off and activate my booster. I’m hurtling through the void, the satellite and ship getting smaller behind me.  
“Alfred! Oh my god! Try and cut the booster!” Ivan’s voice is panicked. He thinks there’s a malfunction.  
“It’s alright. I’m going home.” I repeat.   
“Alfred, you’re out of your mind! Turn around. I’m initiating manual override of your booster.” I’m already going fast enough. I carefully undo the buckles around my chest. I’m free of the booster.   
“I’m going to touch them, Ivan. I’m going to touch the stars.”  
“No, no, turn around!” He’s desperate. His voice is crackling more, becoming distant.  
“I’m going to be a star again.” I whisper.  
“Alfred, no-” Static, fading away to silence. I close my eyes, rushing through nothingness. 

My oxygen levels are low. Critically low. I’ve lost sight of the spaceship. It’s just a speck against the blue marble. I still haven’t reached the stars. Breathing is hard. The stars are beautiful. I reach out to them. Just for a second, my hand brushes against them. They scatter, sparkling and glinting. I smile. My eyes start to close. I used to be a star. Now I return to them.


End file.
